As a 23 year old woman trying to find herself in what some call the " 21st century Great Depression," it's a struggle at times to try and keep a straight head. I'll admit there was actually a moment where I had literally "lost it" (hence the title of the blog) but I'll discuss that another time.
3/5/11
In continuation from what was originally published five months ago, I've made the decision this week to visit blogger.com on a daily basis. It's for the greater good of my well being. SO, with that said...allow myself to introduce..myselves:
I am called (edit: I've decided to post my blog on a public forum). My astrological sign is cancer, which I'm not too proud of, for I do fit the description rather thoroughly. Sensitive, emotional, moody, etc. For the most part I consider myself passive. I'm too nice. I believe cancer possesses many negative qualities. Even the name sounds morbidly unappealing. I would like to make it a goal to banish those negative traits. I'm the eldest of four, however I don't believe I'm looked up to the way an older sister should be. I'm making a conscious effort to decipher the relationship I have with my parents, for they've really fucked me over.. for lack of better words. More on that later...maybe.
In 2007 I became an exotic dancer. I created "Vada." Now I definitely wouldn't call this an alter-ego; it's just a stage name I chose for myself. Unlike many dancers whose alter-egos, at first, manifests in the club, then eventually (or should I say inevitably?) transitions this persona into their everyday life, I find it difficult to do the same even though I wish I could. You'd think becoming an exotic dancer would have created thicker skin as most woman in the industry do; however, I believe it's made me more passive. I can attest that my drug dependence has a lot to do with it. More about that later.
I'm looking forward to my future entries.
